Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize