Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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