Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
