we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
