How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize