Christians are straight up FREAKS
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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