I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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