i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
