He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Randomize
