did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize