Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
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as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
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It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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