I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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