South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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