At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize