she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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