I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
