Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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