Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Randomize
