I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize