The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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