It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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