Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
