i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
