Texts From Last Night

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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.

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  (601): they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell. http://tfl.nu/6mr7
  Replies (53) Good night (8086) Bad night (808)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?

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  (207): do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam? http://tfl.nu/5qkv
  Replies (31) Good night (1008) Bad night (5571)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  i dedicated my morning wood to you.

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  (708): i dedicated my morning wood to you. http://tfl.nu/nbc4
  Replies (17) Good night (5315) Bad night (800)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.

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  (701): I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America. http://tfl.nu/w2zj
  Replies (19) Good night (4398) Bad night (1419)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?

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  (404): he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again? http://tfl.nu/cny9
  Replies (13) Good night (969) Bad night (5696)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on

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  (780): She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on http://tfl.nu/l1qo
  Replies (14) Good night (4353) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place

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  (408): if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place http://tfl.nu/15wd
  Replies (33) Good night (6186) Bad night (1536)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...

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  (336): just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ... http://tfl.nu/0ptt
  Replies (18) Good night (1036) Bad night (2770)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.

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  (337): Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird. http://tfl.nu/9vhr
  Replies (12) Good night (2569) Bad night (1298)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing

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  (778): It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing http://tfl.nu/h5t5
  Replies (5) Good night (768) Bad night (1088)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.

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  (604): The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her. http://tfl.nu/woml
  Replies (7) Good night (1928) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room

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  (513): Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room http://tfl.nu/wjdc
  Replies (4) Good night (1264) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only

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  (647): You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only http://tfl.nu/xu5w
  Replies (11) Good night (490) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.

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  (419): Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women. http://tfl.nu/y0qe
  Replies (2) Good night (535) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked

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  (516): like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked http://tfl.nu/u8p9
  Replies (2) Good night (736) Bad night (284)

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