What a fucking waste of an outfit
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
