Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
accomplished twins. life is a go
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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