i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
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