the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
