if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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