Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
