Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
