a queef is a wish your heart makes.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
