I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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