belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
