i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
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I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
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Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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