im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
from now on my penis is your penis
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
