let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize