now i know why i became what i already was.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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