How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
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