Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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