This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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