I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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