i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
