the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize