It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
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