Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
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