So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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