Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize