and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
