also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
